The following list of “dos and don’ts” had been based on information from the book, PSYCHOLOGICAL EXPERTS IN DIVORCE ACTIONS[1]. Its authors are psychologist “involved in 1000s of custody cases.” This list has been reworked to be more consistent with current language of Illinois law as it was comprehensively changed in 2016. That book states: “A client who is following most of the dos and few or none of the don’ts is in a favorable position to obtain an allocation of parenting time consistent with her or his goals; a client who is performing a few of the dos and most of the don’ts is in an uncertain or negative position to obtain a favorable award.”
The do’s and don’ts suggested in PSYCHOLOGICAL EXPERTS IN DIVORCE were written from a psychologist’s viewpoint. The Gitlin Law Firm’s adapted this list to fit within the perspective of litigation. Yet the goal is to avoid a full-blown parental allocation litigation due to the emotional and financial cost. I agree with the position taken by the authors of the above treatise that a client who follows most or all of the directives—in contrast to a spouse who follows far fewer—is in a very good position to win a battle involving parenting time / responsibilities. That is, if a battle is neccessary. Remind your clients that remaining above the fray and doing what is right relative to the children is difficult. But uniformly, it tends to produce positive long-term results.
[1] Ackerman, Kane and Gould, Wolters Kluwer (7th Ed. 2018).
